Yesterday, after Floatie B (the big one) got hiccups for the fifth time in a day, Matt looked it up. Yes, most valid pregnancy web sites stated that fetal hiccups are totally normal, nothing to worry about. But some of the comments on these sites -- comments from random, non-medical people on the Internet -- claim that too much hiccupping can mean a baby is gasping for breath and perhaps sitting on its own umbilical cord.
Normally, I have a good bullshit meter. But on top of the Baby B hiccups, I was experiencing cramping in the lower right side of my uterus. Or maybe it was just gas. Or it was both. As everyone knows, it's really hard to differentiate between gas and cramps.
Anyway, it was starting to get dark. I was hungry. I was thinking about the fact that my OB is going on vacation for five days next week. Suddenly I was afraid that those Internet comments were right. Floatie B was slowly strangling himself in my womb and I would soon be faced with the worst nightmare any expectant mom could have.
"Matt," I yelled. "I need my phone. I have to call the doctor." As I was dialing, I looked at my husband and asked, "Do you think I'm crazy?" More than almost anything, I hate the idea of being one of those paranoid, annoying moms. But Matt looked scared too. We'd both let the Internet comments get to us and wanted to be safe instead of sorry.
Before I knew it, my doctor was on the line and I told her everything that was happening. She assured me, "there is no such thing as too many hiccups" for a baby in utero. "Hiccups," she said, "are one of the most reassuring signs of a healthy baby."
I hung up. I cried from relief. And then I started to worry about why Foatie A has not had the hiccups yet.
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